Pregnancy and Infant Loss

 

Our hearts are heavy for you that you are experiencing such a great loss. Some of this information included in this packet may be helpful today, while some might be more appropriate in the days ahead. Please know our providers are available to speak with you regarding any physical or emotional concerns you may have. Pastoral care services are offered at all of our hospital locations as well. Counseling may help you cope with your grief. Later, if you do decide to try again, work closely with your health care provider to lower the risks. Please be assured that you will be in our thoughts and prayers. May you find grace and strength for your healing and recovery.

Informational Resources & Support

 

Pregnancy Loss - The unintentional and spontaneous death of an unborn baby (fetus) at any time during pregnancy. Pregnancy loss includes an embryonic pregnancy, a miscarriage, an ectopic pregnancy, a molar pregnancy and/or a stillbirth. A pregnancy loss prior to 20 weeks gestation is often referred to as a miscarriage or a spontaneous abortion, while a pregnancy loss greater than 20 completed weeks is often referred to as a stillbirth or fetal death.

Infant Loss - The loss of any anticipated life, whether it is during a pregnancy or the time following delivery.

Neonatal Death - When a baby dies in the first 28 days of life. There are many reasons that cause a neonatal death including prematurity, low birth weight, and birth defects.

Live Birth - A baby born alive at delivery that is evident by means of a heart rate, pulsation of the umbilical cord, spontaneous breathing, and/or voluntary muscle movement regardless of gestational age.

Perinatal Hospice and Palliative Care - A compassionate model of support that embraces the philosophy of hospice and palliative care. This program is designed for parents who choose to continue their pregnancy following a prenatal diagnosis that indicates their baby has a life-limiting condition. This approach is multidisciplinary and individualized for each family.

What to expect

  • You will be provided with medication that will start your labor. This process generally produces pain. You are able to choose the pain relief options that best suit your comfort level at this time. 

  • The staff will provide you with a special comfort cart to allow for privacy in the room. 

  • You will be asked to make decisions around burial or cremation.

  • You will be asked if you want special mementos from your delivery. 

  • We encourage you to rest and spend quality time with those you wish to be present at this time. 

  • Photography is always an option. We partner with a service that can support you locally. 

What to bring to the hospital 

  • You may bring anything that is comforting to you and your family while in the facility. 

  • You may choose to have family with you throughout your stay. 

  • You may bring clothes or special items for your baby. 

  • You may bring items to capture special moments with your family such as photos, books, music, and etc.. 

Labor 

  • You may follow your original birth plan as the provider allows. This would include hydrotherapy, etc.. 

Baptism: A Chaplain from the facility or a Community Faith Representative of the family may provide a baptism, in a health care setting, in emergent situations.

Blessing: A Chaplain from the facility or a Community Faith Representative of the family may provide A Rite for Naming, Blessing, and Commending a Baby to God may be provided in the event the newborn was born and a Baptism is unable to be performed.  

Our hearts go out to you at this difficult time. It may be hard to make important decisions. We want to make sure you know all of your options for disposition. Although it is difficult to discuss, you have the right to pick how and where your baby is laid to rest,  whether privately through a mortuary of your choice or through hospital burial. The options for you are based on personal preference, income, due date, and if your baby was born alive or still. Below are some of those deciding factors. 

Private Burial/Creamation at a Mortuary (Cremation/Burial)

You may choose a private burial through a mortuary at any time, no matter the gestation of when your baby was delivered and if they were born alive or still (no signs of life). You may choose individual burial or cremation, no matter how early or how far along you were in your pregnancy. However, you must choose this option if your baby was alive at the time of delivery. Most people choose a funeral home to help make individual arrangements. Please ask if you would like help finding a funeral home.

  • For parents who choose a private burial, you will choose a private mortuary to cremate or bury your baby. 
  • Any baby born alive must be cremated or buried through a mortuary. Please see campus for specific resources for options if you would need to select one.
  • Any remains believed by the parents or the provider to be fetal tissue or products of conception will be treated with respect allowing you to choose a private mortuary to either cremate or bury your baby.
  • Artful Ashes is a wonderful piece of glass artwork that captures the life of your baby following the cremation process.
Hospital Burial Option

 

You may choose a hospital burial through the hospital service at any time, no matter the gestation of when your baby was delivered if they were born still (no signs of life). If your baby was born with any signs of life the burial or cremation must go through a mortuary. 

 

  • For parents who choose hospital burial, each campus will hold a service. While we are a Catholic organization, the service is non-denominational and open to families of any faith tradition. This service is a communal burial, meaning your baby will be placed in a casket with other babies. 
  • See local campus information on burial services, below.
  • A baby born alive will not be able to be placed in the hospital for burial. 
  • Any remains believed by the parents or the provider to be fetal tissue or products of conception will be treated in a similar manner and may be placed in the hospital service.  
  • Any fetal death or stillbirth of any gestation will be treated in a similar manner  and may be placed in the hospital service.

Undecided

If you are undecided and do not inform the hospital of your choice for disposition within fourteen days, the hospital will include the remains in the hospital burial. If you would like to speak to someone regarding the above information, please ask the clinic staff to contact Pastoral Care.

Celebration of Life Memorial Service 

Each year the facility will celebrate the life of your baby, regardless of length of pregnancy or time on earth through a Memorial Service or Walk-of-Life. CHI Health will send an invitation to your home a few weeks prior to the service. The nurse will review the opinion with you in the hospital or clinic and you will be able to decline an invitation. There is a city-wide “Walk to Remember” the first Sunday in October in Lincoln, NE.

CHI Health Certificate of Life - CHI health provides you with a certificate in memory of your baby upon discharge regardless of length of pregnancy or time on earth.

Certificates

The State of Nebraska has passed a few laws to help recognize and validate the birth of your baby by way of passing. For more information on certificates please visit the Nebraska Department of Health & Human services website.

  • Commemorative Certificate of Nonviable Birth: This certificate applies to any spontaneous fetal demise, miscarriage, which has occurred prior to twenty weeks gestation. A health care practitioner shall verify the loss by signing the Worksheet for Nonviable Birth Commemorative Certificate, filled out by the parent(s). The completed worksheet shall be sent to the state to request the certificate, along with the Application for Commemorative Certificate of Nonviable Birth. For more information with regards to this certificate, please visit the Nebraska Department of Health & Human services website. As with any certified certificate, there will be a small fee applied from the state to obtain the certificate.

  • Certificate of Birth Resulting in Stillbirth: This applies to any stillbirth, baby born with no signs of life that has reached 20 weeks or more weeks of gestation. If you choose a hospital burial we will complete the documentation and file it with the State of Nebraska. If you choose a private burial with a mortuary the hospital will complete the documentation and send it with your baby to the mortuary, where they will file it with the State of Nebraska. Please use the Application for Certificate of Birth Resulting in Stillbirth to request the certificate that is included within this packet.For more information with regards to this certificate, please visit the Nebraska Department of Health & Human services website. As with any certified copy, there will be a small fee applied from the state to obtain the certificate.

  • Birth and Death Certificate: This applies to any baby that was born alive and passed away after birth. The hospital will file a birth certificate with the State of Nebraska. Once the mortuary resumes care of the baby they will file a death certificate with the State of Nebraska. For more information with regards to this certificate, please visit the Nebraska Department of Health & Human services website. As with any certified copy, there will be a small fee applied from the state to obtain the certificate

 Iowa Vital Records Certificates

Mental Health:

Breast Care:

Four Phases of Grief

1. Shock and Numbness (Characteristics most intense first 2 weeks)

  • Short attention span
  • Difficult to concentrate
  • Impaired decision-making
  • Stunned, disbelief
  • Resistant to stimuli
  • Impeded function
  • Denial
  • Time confusion
  • Failure to accept reality

2. Searching and Yearning (Characteristics dominant 2nd week through 4th month)

  • Sensitive to stimuli
  • Anger/guilt, dreams
  • Restless
  • Double meaning
  • Testing what is real
  • Irritability
  • Weight gain or loss
  • Sleeping difficulties
  • Aching arms
  • Obsession to get pregnant again
  • Preoccupation with the deceased
  • Resentment
  • Bitterness
  • Time confusion
  • Palpitations
  • Sighing
  • Lack of strength
  • Headaches

3. Disorientation (Characteristics dominant 5th through 9th month)

  • Think “I am going crazy”
  • Social withdrawal
  • Disorganized
  • Forgetful
  • Awareness of reality
  • Depressed
  • Guilt
  • Insomnia
  • Anorexia
  • Weight gain or loss
  • Sense of failure
  • Sadness
  • Exhaustion
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Feels ill - “sick role”
  • Lacks energy

4. Reorganization/Resolution (Characteristics dominant 9th through 24th month)

  • Sense of release
  • Renewed energy
  • Able to make decisions easier
  • Eating and sleeping habits re-established
  • Able to laugh and smile again
  • Increased awareness in self-esteem (appearance, diet, rest, exercise)

  • Centering Corporation 

    Wide range of grief literature and resources.

  • National Grief Support Database
  • Postpartum Support International 
    • Resources and discussion support material for parents coping with grief.
  • March of Dimes
    • Resources, support, and strength you need to heal among a community of people who share an unspoken connection for those who are experiencing grief from a miscarriage, stillbirth, or neonatal loss.
  • Safe to Sleep
    • Explore resources for families who have experienced the tragic loss of a baby.
  • First Candle 
    • A nonprofit organization committed to helping babies reach their first birthdays. Select from the “Bereavement” menu on the website for grief and support resources.
  • Children's Bereavement Center
    • Provides resources, events, and free peer-support groups for children, young adults, adults, and families dealing with the death of a loved one.
  • Cribs for Kids
    • Provides resources related to grief and bereavement for the loss of an infant. This non-profit organization provides free or reduced-cost safe sleep spaces and safe sleep education to families. 
  • Haven Midwest
    • Through love and loss, Haven works to make a difference by building a community of support for parents who have endured the tremendous loss of a child providing resources, gifts, and healing events.
  • The Miss Foundation
    • Quick access to counseling resources, advocacy information, research on traumatic grief, education for healthcare providers and community members, and support services for those grieving the death, or impending death, of a child. 
  • Return to Zero Center for Healing
    • RTZ HOPE is a national non-profit organization that provides holistic support, resources, and community for all people who have experienced unimaginable loss during the journey to parenthood.

 

 

  • CHI Health Open Arms Infant Bereavement Support Group

    • Support group meets monthly and is for families who have experienced the loss of a baby during pregnancy, at birth or shortly after birth.

    • The group meets on Wednesday evenings from 7 - 8 p.m. during every month except January, May and September. Join the facebook group as well.

    • Location: West Hills Church - Lower Level Library, 3015 South 82nd Avenue, Omaha, NE 68124

    • Park on the north side of the church and use the north entrance on Spring Street. The library is on the lower level at the bottom of the steps to the left once inside the church.

    • There is no fee to attend this group. Call (402) 669-7581 if you would like more information.

  • Connected Forever 

    • Connected Forever supports families who have experienced premature birth or infant loss by providing resources, funeral burial assistance, education, and emotional support.

  • No Footprint Too Small 

    • No Footprint Too Small is a 501c3 nonprofit organization located in Lincoln, Nebraska. Our mission is to provide comprehensive perinatal support to mothers, fathers, and families who are affected by pregnancy or infant loss.

  • The Collective for Hope 

    • Collective of Hope is a collection of three different support groups providing free, high-quality grief, loss, bereavement, and survivorship support to parent’s children, and families. 

Local Information by City

Omaha-Metro services are held the last Friday of the month in April (following Easter) and October (Following all Souls day, which  may end up being the first Friday in November) at the St. Mary Magdalene Cemetery located on Q Street between 46th & 48th Streets. This service will take place at the mausoleum near the Q Street entrance of the cemetery.

You are welcome to bring family members and friends who have shared in your loss. 

Omaha Ceremony Dates:

  • Time: 11:00 am-12:00 pm

  • 2024 Dates:

    • Friday, April 19, 2024

    • Friday, November 1, 2024

  • 2025 Dates:

    • Friday, April 25, 2025

    • Friday, October 24, 2025

Memorial 

City-wide “Walk to Remember” the first Sunday in October in Lincoln, Nebraska.

Omaha Metro Maternity & Birth Centers

Pastoral Care Numbers:

Omaha/Council Bluffs Private Funeral Home Information:

View PDF of all metro area information.

BRIDGES

Bereavement, Resources, Infant Loss, Death, Grief, Encouragement and Support

The CHI Health St. Elizabeth BRIDGES Program is a bereavement support system for families who experience a pregnancy loss through miscarriage, ectopic (tubal) pregnancy, stillbirth or newborn death.

We believe that mourning the loss of a baby (no matter what the gestational age) is difficult but important work. Our mission is to provide sensitive care, information about grief and empathetic support and encouragement on a one-to-one basis.

Our BRIDGES program includes:

  • A BRIDGES packet containing resource material on grief given to each individual experiencing a loss
  • On-going grief support through follow-up phone calls and/or written notes during the first year
  • As many mementos of the baby as possible, created by the nursing staff and given to the parents at no cost
  • Information provided about available community support
  • Acceptance of referrals from local providers and surrounding communities
  • Palliative care pre-birth counseling for families of babies with life-limiting diagnosis
  • Annual Memorial Services
    • Spring service at St. Elizabeth
    • City-wide “Butterfly Release” the third Sunday in August
    • City-wide “Walk to Remember” the first Sunday in October
    • City-wide “Time of Remembrance” candle lighting the second Sunday in December
  • Annual fall workshop for health care providers who care for families experiencing pregnancy loss

BRIDGES grief supporters are Registered Nurses who have received additional education through Resolve Through Sharing (RTS) Bereavement Services. They are available to listen, offer support, encouragement and consolation. There is no charge for our BRIDGES program. For more information, call (402) 219-7065.

EMBRACE

Perinatal Palliative Care & Hospice Program

Embrace: Every Moment Brief, Remembered Always, Cherished Eternally

The CHI Health St. Elizabeth EMBRACE program is a support system for families who are facing the knowledge that their unborn baby has a life-limiting diagnosis.

The EMBRACE team consists of doctors, nurses, social workers and pastoral care ministers who strive to address the physical, spiritual and emotional needs of the family when they receive this life-changing information.

We recognize that every moment a family spends with their baby is precious. We desire to create a sacred and safe environment where a family can give birth and honor the life of their child even though the time may be brief.

  • One-on-one support for families to assist with creating individualized birth plans
  • Resource materials to support families throughout their pregnancy and following birth
  • The opportunity to meet with care providers to discuss medical interventions that families may desire following the birth of their baby
  • Spiritual support through Pastoral Care and Ministers within the community
  • Private tours of the Advanced Baby Center™ and the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit
  • The creation of baby photographs and keepsakes for families
  • Ongoing follow-up and support for family and friends

For more information, please contact the EMBRACE Coordinator at (402) 219-7065.

Pastoral Care - (402) 219-7394

Lincoln Maternity Center

 

 

Memorial services are part of a healing process that helps us honor the memory of our loved one and reach out to one another.  In remembrance of those babies stillborn, miscarried, or who have died in infancy, CHI Health Good Samaritan has an annual infant memorial service on the first Sunday in June at 3 p.m. at Kearney Cemetery.  You will receive an invitation to the service a few weeks prior. While you cannot mark the gravesite with your baby's name, there is a headstone in place at the site.

The Pastoral Care Staff and the Maternity Center of Good Samaritan, along with local clergy, conduct a special interfaith service.  Parents and other family members who will not have the opportunity to watch their young one grow are cordially invited to attend and share in this meaningful time of memory.  The service includes music, prayers, scripture and poetry.

For more information, contact the Maternity Center at (308) 865-7137.

Pastoral Care - (308) 233-5200

Resources:

Maternity Center in Kearney

Grief Counselors in Grand Island:

These agencies have providers who have either specialized training in perinatal bereavement or experience working in this
area. Hours, fees and insurances covered vary.


Melissa Adams, LICSW
702 W. Koenig. Grand Island
Main Contact: (308) 381-0608

CHI Health Psychiatric Associates
Call for locations and hours of operation.
Main Contact: (402) 717-HOPE (4673)

Dayna Allen-Prairie Winds Healing
908 North Howard, Suite 102. Grand Island
Main Contact: (308) 398-6050

Jordan Allen-Family Resources
3532 W. Capital Ave. Grand Island
Main Contact: (308) 381-7487

Sarah Griess, Psy.D.-Rising Hope Counseling
312 N. Elm Street, Suite 115. Grand Island
Main Contact: (308) 380-5719

Anna Hain, LMHP-Blue Water Counseling and Consulting
3710 Central Ave, Suite #4. Kearney, NE
Main Contact: (308) 210-4631

Carlene Headrick-Family Resources
3532 West Capital Ave. Grand Island
Main Contact: (308) 381-7487

Hope in Healing, LLC
217 East Stolley Park, Suite K. Grand Island
Main Contact: (402) 469-0183

Sondra McKinney-New Life Counseling
312 North Elm, Suite 107. Grand Island
Main Contact: (402) 519-0054

Monty Shultz, LICSW-Monty Shultz Counseling
124 W. 25th Street, Suite B4. Kearney, NE
404 W. Charles Street. Grand Island
Main Contact: (308) 627-6119 for either clinic

Wholeness Healing Center, PC
2608 Old Fair Road. Grand Island
Main Contact: (308) 382-5297

Lynn Widdifield, LMHP, ATR-BC, EMDR
1811 West 2nd Street, Suite 310. Grand Island
Main Contact: 308-381-0787
[email protected]